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The Worlds Most Expensive Paintball Gun

This was written by Doc Nickel and posted on the POG Forum following this one comment: "I still want to see a Nasty Classic Typhoon."

"Well now, since we're opening up the ol' bottomless wallet, why not a Classic Tiger-nickel Nasty Typhoon TEMPEST, with custom-fit 45 grip, Doc special vent rib with Sight hood and an on-gun 114 4500 Apocalypse with a UniReg. Throw on a pair of VL3K Revolution "Gems", drop in a complete set of AKA low pressure stuff (Set & a half?) and fill it up with All-Star.

Well hell, since we're heatin' the house with folding green, I can think of a couple more ways to make it heavier and more expensive... First off, have your own 6000 psi tank made, wrapped with Spectra fiber and beta cloth, instead of that wimpy carbon fiber wussy stuff. Hook that to an Apocalypse regulator machined at great expense from beryllium copper, and hook THAT to a UniReg milled out of manganese bronze. Use NASA-spec reactor-grade stainless steel instrument tubing to plumb the two together. Have the stainless cadmium irridited for looks and corrosion resistance. Make the hammer from Inconel-sheathed depleted Uranium for density, with a tungsten impact surface. Oh yeah, instead of plain-jane compressed air or nitrogen, use 6000-psi Xenon or Krypton gas. Buy the purified and tracably-certified laboratory-grade gas, instead of that common neon-tube-industrial-grade stuff. Add on one of those 50mm Pro-Dot scopes. Mount an underbarrel full-color stereo sound broadcast quality video camera and a 2Gigahertz transmitter to the video crew standing by to record your huge kill-ratios. Pay ESPN for a realtime, no-commericals, direct satellite uplink relay each time you play a game. Pay Nike to put your logo on all their shoes. Instead of nickel-plating, have Palmer's use real quarters. Okay, now I'm getting silly....."

Doc Nickel